Due to unbelievable timing, I was an employee of a company for merely 2-3 days. But even today, I can’t forget the intro speech by the HR. A Malayalee, wearing modest cloths than even his junior (who was in business professional), gave a short talk. It had nothing to do with the company or the work we were supposed to do! With his piercing eyes and voice, he talked about a generic topic but that would help grow each person.
He started off by asking the employees to list their idol person. I had two in my mind – Ramanujam and my father. When he said, for the sake of the batch to relate, we should list a familiar name, I remained with Ramanujam. Then he went around the class asking why is that person our idol and what made him successful. It was obvious that he was looking for a common thread and something more powerful that applies to everyone. I had the right answer, passion.(1)
His talk after that had nothing to do with the company (which is the usual orientation speech), or with our career in that company. I was humoring myself if that was because he was as new as us, that he doesn’t know and can just do with a generic talk. But even today, the way he spoke remains with me. It was about motivation, passion and one’s personal growth. I grew a lot of respect for him and wished I could know him more.
I often told my friends during my job changes, that ‘I know this is not what I want to do, but I don’t know what I want to do’. Somewhere that time I read a book or an article, which said, it is OK not to know what we really want to do. That gave me some relief, otherwise I was being worried that I was so clueless. Some get that earlier in life, some realize later, it said. I just hoped it is not ‘never’ for me.
The picking of concentration/focus in MBA , the job hunts were mostly elimination process than selection process.
The one thing I did just pre-MBA and during MBA is to try out various activities – try out to know if I like them. I like being busy
Over the last few weeks and months, though I am back in the confusion mode. For one, I have incredibly talented friends, and I continue to be in a complex. During various conversations, it would come up to how I spend my time. I go to parties, events, talks, read enormous amounts of articles, watch movies, lots of videos etc while they do productive activities like art, electronic projects, building up businesses etc.
What I am not sure is if my activities are passions or just fillers. One conversation went like this :
P: How do you get time to read/post so much on Facebook/Twitter.
Me: Huh, that’s all I do. I post less than 5% of what I read ! I have no life – no kids, no family – with plenty of time, all I do is being an internet junkie. ( I wasn’t being self-deprecating, but that’s just what it is…)
P: What is your passion ?
Me: I don’t know if I have one
P: Everyone does, you just need to find it.
P: What would you do if you had all the money and time in the world
Me: I would watch movies, read and write*.
P: Then it seems you are living your life !
(* I would really like to write a lot; I also said, I would work towards getting into better health; also my another friend reminded my another interest to travel the world)
But the thing is, none of them are what you may call my ‘passions’.
1. He then went on to describe his life and his rise in his career – though he was in late 30s or early 40s, given that he started his career very late due to other constraints, his rise was commendable.